You’ve got the ring on your finger (maybe… it’s not always the case BUTTTT it is becoming more common to plan a wedding prior to an engagement), the partner of your dreams, your Pinterest board that you’ve had since you were young, and the determination to plan your wedding in one weekend. Now, you just need to decide if you’re eloping or planning a small wedding.
The wheels are turning: you’re writing ideas down, Pinterest boards are updated, the guest list is created and then BOOM! You’re sitting there overwhelmed with the amount of information flooding in from social media.
- What trends to stay up to date on
- How you MUST have this wedding outfit
- Or the florals you envisioned are considered outdated as of last month
And now you don’t know what to do.
You’re thinking, “is this wedding really what I want? Do I really need the 250 guest list, 30k venue, or spending most of the day apart from my partner?”
Don’t get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having a large traditional wedding! But, I also believe there is a pressure from society to have the grand day without truly thinking about what you truly want.
Then the idea comes to your head “what if we had a smaller wedding or just eloped?”
I Was a Bride in Your Exact Shoes and Here is What I Did
I was exactly in your spot not too long ago! My husband and I (mostly me though), knew we didn’t want a large wedding but also weren’t sure if we wanted a small wedding or an elopement. Being in the industry myself, the options and ideas were endless but often overwhelming.
Hence why I am writing this blog because I have couples just like you experiencing similar feelings and uncertainty around how to celebrate. So, I’m giving you three ways to help you choose between eloping or having a small, intimate wedding to make the planning process smoother for you!
3 Reasons to Help You Choose Between Eloping or Having a Small Wedding
1. Your ideal day
When you sit down and think about your wedding day, and I mean truly sit down, no distractions, just you and a pen and paper, what comes to mind.
- Is it the location?
- The people around you?
- Is it just you and your partner running around the city doing all your favorite things together?
Write everything down.
This is your daydreaming stage. No idea goes unturned and everything is possible. If you could have everything you want, what would your day look like?
Once you’ve brain dumped all your ideas onto paper, ask yourself what stands out the most. Does it involve family and friends? Or just your partner?
If having more people around you is showing up more in your brain dump, then a smaller wedding may be for you! If your day looks like it’s just you and your partner, then an elopement may be in your future!
If you’re looking to see what an intimate wedding may look like, check out this blog about what makes an intimate wedding great.
2. Logistics
After brain dumping all your ideas, consider what the logistics would look like for your small wedding or elopement.
- If the location you dream about is out of state, how would family and friends get there? Is there easy access to the ceremony location? Are permits involved?
- If it’s in state, is there a specific venue you’d want it at? What would your timeline look like?
These are small yet mighty questions you and your partner have to ask yourself when it comes to deciding between an elopement or an intimate wedding. An elopement can be as simple as running to the courthouse and signing the marriage license whereas a small wedding requires a bit more coordination from yourself and other vendors.
This is the phase where you consider how much planning you want to do when it comes to planning your wedding day and the level of stress you can manage.
3. Sway from the traditional
The fun part that comes with deciding between eloping or a small wedding is you can sway from the traditional. If you’re still torn between eloping or a small wedding, there are a multitude of things you can do to make it one of a kind.
You can have a multi day wedding and read why it may work for you through this blog post! My husband and I did this and eloped in 2023 and had our reception in 2024 and many of my clients have also gone the same route!
It keeps stress low and you get the best of both worlds if you can’t decide on wanting an elopement or a small wedding.
You can also see what a real life elopement would look like through S and J’s day! They wanted to elope but also decided to include family and have a private dinner afterwards. It kept their day intimate but also included those who meant the most to them.
The point is, you are allowed to create a day that fits best to what you want! Whether it’s an elopement or a small, intimate wedding, your wedding is your wedding and you can make it what you want it to be! Whether it’s just the two of you, with just family, or a whole venue filled with the people you love, you are still getting married to the person you love.
If you’re looking for more resources and information on deciding between an elopement or a small wedding, contact me here to start brainstorming!
